Yeshiva Lore - Exchanging Character Traits

 בס"ד

A popular idea circulating in the yeshivas is that if a person harms his comrade, the comrade takes one of the offender's merits and gives him one of the victim's failings. However if a person is kind to his friend they exchange good characteristics while their own merits remain intact. It is similar to the discussion of Moshe rebenu giving of his prophecy to the seventy elders. Most commentaries are like the Sifrei (Bamidbar 93) which says, "What was Moses like at that moment? He was like a light that is placed in a candlestick from which everybody lights his candles and yet its illuminating power is not the least diminished; so too the wisdom of Moshe did not lose anything". There is another opinion that a small amount of the oil that was in Moshe's candle was poured into the cups of the seventy elders. In other words Moshe did lose something. The debate would seem to depend on the propriety of Moshe's request for assistance.

The basic idea for the yeshivish maxim revolves around the principle that G-d rewards people who keep the Torah and punishes those that don't. Part of this idea is that G-d is the judge of the world including all actions between people. Therefore if one harms another a penalty is exacted from the offender and given to the victim. It's a powerful conciliation, because it appeals to a person's sense of justice and vengeance. On the other hand an act of kindness is a gift to the recipient. It is also commendable conduct therefore the bestower receives remuneration from heaven. A good remuneration would be learning something from the person he was kind to.

These things though are very subtle and ordinarily not widely visible to the eye of flesh and blood. Some people do see it clearly. To others it is visible to the eye in the heart and perceived through the prism of faith. There may even be some apocryphal stories about it. From the standpoint of psychology and human nature it does make sense. I was not able to find the original source for this maxim. It could be propaganda spread by the administration to encourage the students to be well behaved. In any case it's a virtue that people will have such a belief and that it would be widespread.

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